Trying to Conceive

Ok- this is not something that people normally talk about, but when you put it in the light of adoption, it is easier to swallow.
Lately, I have been feeling similar to a time about 3 years ago today, when Kyle and I were hoping that I would soon pee on a stick and find out that there was a growing alien monkey in my belly (or something of the sort). I have been spending much of my free time on the Internet looking up information on Nepal adoptions, hotels in Kathmandu, and the cost of airfare from Minneapolis to Nepal. I am thinking about this baby so much of the time I truly feel like I am in the in between stage where I notice all the little things that seem out of place, if I’m nauseous, more tired than normal, or my boobs feel off. Except, instead, I just sit next to my phone waiting for a call instead of peeing on that stick. Slightly different physical feeling, but it’s the same feeling in the heart.
So tonight on my way to class I was thinking so hard about all of these things that I got frustrated because I needed to put them down on paper. At the moment when I felt as if I was going to explode with frustration, I remembered my “out” when I was pregnant with River- this! So, hopefully, as the time to our referral gets closer, and my emotions rise and fall, I will use this as my outlet. So, I apologize for any inappropriate words or thoughts that make their way onto this page in the near future. This adoption thing has been a lesson in patience, excitement, fear and love. It truly encompasses all.

So, except for all the crazy “pregnant” thoughts and feelings I’ve been having lately, things have been going well. Life is starting to get a little crazy again since school has started and all the other little things that go along with it. River seems to be enjoying daycare again, and I am missing him more than ever. He can be such a little charmer sometimes (and also a major 2 year old other times), but so goes life with a crazy little, adorable and loving little boy. I hope he reads this someday and blushes. He really is that great.

So when it comes to the specifics with adoption, things are moving. It is Nepal’s holiday season right now (Dashain), which lasts around a month. On one of my yahoo groups I get the impression that the holidays hasn’t completely stopped the referral process. People around the globe are still getting referrals of their soon to be beautiful children. One thing I have not seen much of is referrals for infants. This makes me wonder if there are many out there (well, we know there are thousands of kids living in orphanages in Nepal, but not all are registered with the ministry). We specifically asked for a girl between the ages of 0-10 months. Most people, if they want to adopt an infant say 0-1 year. I hope this younger request doesn’t hurt us and make us wait years. I have fallen in love with the country of Nepal (again…) so I hope it is not years until we meet our baby girl.

One of the blogs I have read, and explains a lot about the process (especially in her early posts) is: http://nepaladoptionrumors.blogspot.com/

If you are interested in the process that we hope to experience very soon, this is a great thing to read.

Shanti (peace)

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2 thoughts on “Trying to Conceive

  1. Erin,
    Honestly, I would love for you to speak with my friend Karen who adopted two from Africa over a year ago. She has lots to share and I am certain that you would learn a great deal more than you already know. Check out my facebook for Karen Smith, she will gladly bring you on as a friend.

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